July 8, 2010 Hot advice

"More tropical than the tropics," is how Environment Canada's Dave Phillips describes us these days as we swelter, sweat and sizzle through the first heat wave in what seems like a hundred years.
It's actually of course, only about three years since we've seen a sustained period of heat.

Every day this week, we're deluged with the latest oh-so-serious list of how hot it is, how hot it feels like and the things we should do or refrain from doing to beat the heat.

I hereby offer up my own personal list of things to do and to avoid during a heat wave:

Number one: Avoid driving to Toronto. This applies pretty much any time, but it is especially important to avoid the drive to the 'big smoke' during a heat wave if your air conditioning has suddenly conked out, like mine did. It's even more true if you arrive on University avenue just as a major power outage begins, like I did on Monday.

Number Two: Avoid walking distances greater than from the backyard pool to the fridge.This one goes without saying, really. Any exertion at any time is to be avoided, but during a heat wave, you have the excuse to sit really still and watch the football.

Number Three: Avoid Ironing. Even if you somehow think it might be a good idea to set up outside under an awning to avoid negating your air conditioning inside, it's just not. If it's so hot you're afraid of losing even one teeny fraction of your AC indoors, handling a hot appliance anywhere is just a bad idea. Go get yourself some knit tops and give up on the linen.

And Number Four: Freezies. Get yourself some freezies, the old-fashioned, plastic-wrapped frozen sweetened water treats. The bigger the better. If you're stuck in a Toronto traffic jam in a heat wave, are forced to walk several blocks after dropping your car off at the mechanic, or have foolishly thought linen really was the way to go this year, a freezie can make all those troubles somehow magically disappear.