Monday, August 13, 2012

Review: Borin' Bourne

Sweetie and I have a longstanding joke about our relationship with movies: We TALK about going to out the movies but we never actually GO out to the movies.

But we do. About twice a year. Mostly when there's a big action flick like Mission Impossible 692 or a new Bond film or, as was the case this weekend, a new addition to the Bourne franchise, which, in case you missed the hype, does not actually contain a Bourne.

Nope, there's no Matt Damon in the latest Bourne movie.

There's also barely a plot.

Sweetie and I were discussing this on the way home from the theatre, bellies gurgling from too much double buttered popcorn and too much overpriced candy. (Really? Maltesers? Really? What was I thinking?)

I asked whether the first Bourne flick really had a plot to it, rather than merely plot devices, and we decided it certainly did have an actual plot: guy wakes up with no notion of his own identity and slowly discovers he's a killer being targetted by the people who trained him. I loved the scene where Bourne speaks to and then beats up a pair of Germans, discovering to his surprise that he speaks German! And can fight!

The subsequent two movies featured plots that were a bit ... convoluted, shall we say, however, there was definitely something going on. This one? Not so much.

Ostensibly, the Bourne Legacy is taking place concurrently with the Bourne Identity, and the main character is also an agent, but in a different program. Because of what's happened with Bourne, the entire program is cancelled. When the program is cancelled, the agent's lives are forfeit. One survives.

While Jeremy Renner and Rachel Weisz put in good performances, it just feels like someone at the movie studio said, "Plot? Character development? Bah! What we need are more killers with no conscience and more chase scenes through crowded city street! Oh, and jerky camera movements! Yeah! That's what people want!"

And that's what you get. Surely for all the money spent on blowing stuff up, which they do a LOT and very well, there could be a couple hundred bucks slipped to a writer to come up with a bit more of... something.

And while I'm being taken advantage of at the movie theatre, don't get me started on paying $43.18 for two tickets, popcorn and pop to share and two wee bags of candy -urp-

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